It’s true! I can’t quit Trump boot/ass licker Jeff “Hey I’m only the second-richest man in the world” Bezos because I’m in business with him! Literally! A month or two I said I was splitzie with Jeff over his total trashing of what was left of always dubious journalistic integrity of the Bezos-owned Washington Post,…
Tag: Jeff Bezos
Jeff Bezos thinks you’re stupid
Jeff Bezos, shown here with his lovely fiancé Lauren Sánchez, clearly has bigger things on his mind than the freedom of the press, and, really, who can blame him? Jeff, who, his intimates say, prefers to be addressed as “Hef”, also has to think about things like, well, his space program “Blue Origin”—which, unlike, say,…
Jeff Bezos wins “World’s Biggest *sshole” Contest Without Even Trying!
Suck on this, Elon Musk! Shiver with rage, Mark Zuckerberg! Pretend you don’t care, Bill Gates! And Richard Branson, go fly a kite! Yeah, losers, Cap’n Jeff Bezos has just beaten you all, without even trying, because his brand new, motherfucking high tech sail-powered yacht is so motherfucking big they’ll have to dismantle the motherfucking…
Rocket Man!
If you don’t mind—and even if you do—I’m going to take a brief victory lap for pointing out, waaaay ahead of the curve, that the ever-burgeoning billionaire obsession with space travel was really all about the dicks from the get-go, as the recent launch of Jeff Bezos’s all-mighty “Flying Phallus” so amply represents. Jeff, or…
Yo, Jeff Bezos! Who writes your scripts, John Bolton?
If, like me, your so-called life has significant late-night gaps, empty hours when you’re too tired, or too lazy, to do anything improving, like reading another history of the Thirty Years War, whose impact still echoes down the corridors of time, or “significant”, like watching a new version of Don Giovanni,1 you might, if you’re…
Jeff Bezos, with a penis on his pocket, and lookin’ mighty like an asshole
I’ve previously descanted on the tendency of billionaires to develop a fondness for large, penis-shaped objects. Well, we can, obviously, add Jeff Bezos to that list. Jeff, with his shaved head n’ shades lookin’ seriously Walter White, is shown posin’ with a rocket (reusable, of course) that’s part of his space transportation company “Blue Origin”….
Things the Washington Post thinks I might want to buy
A grout brush; a “Carbon Express” crossbow; and some Pampers. Jeff Bezos, you might update your software. Soon.
The Post Re-Bezosed
Why did Jeff Bezos buy the Washington Post? Knows God, as the saying goes. As everyone knows, Bezos and Amazon have been totally about the process; the customers sort out the content for themselves. As Felix Salmon notes, Jeff has never had to deal with “talent,” which is what journalists like to think they are….