Legal humor here “She burns methane ’stead a-burpin’ it, for one thing. Mother Nature thanks me, and you will too.” “Yeah, sure, manure is Nature’s way. But it ain’t my way. My way’s the highway, so excuse my exhaust.” “And another thing. She don’t draw no flies.” “You know that feller who said we don’t…
Tag: cartoon
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “I was wrong, Sylvia. You do have a death wish.” “I was just telling Harry we needed a window. Thanks to you the job’s half done!” “Sylvia, am I to consider this an expression of dissatisfaction with your ranking on this week’s tennis ladder or simply a boiling over of general ill…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Listen, bub, I’ve been goin’ to the moon for thirty years. You can take that space-time continuum crap and shove it up Uranus. Ha, ha! Get it?” “So he says ‘Where have I seen you before?’ and I says ‘Oklahoma’ and he says ‘Where in Oklahoma?’ and I says ‘The third act’….
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “If we want to really levitate this fucker I think we should be holding hands.” “Okay, today’s mantra, if you haven’t already guessed, is ‘boots’.” “Was everyone comfortable with that ‘Om’? Or maybe I should say, was anyone comfortable with that ‘Om’? Listen, people. Buddha loves winners, and, by extension, Buddha hates…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here. “You won’t mind backing up Helen on this one, will you, honey?” “Hey, it’s Magicianalapallooza! Anything can happen! But, you know, probably not twice in a row.” “Remember Grace Kelly? That was her box.” “Hey, I’m loving the cheekbones and I’m loving the legs. So, you know, whichever suits you.” “Yep, small on the…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here. “Damn! Who let the dogs out?” “Just remember, Smedley, if they don’t have a ceiling, we don’t have a floor.” “Wow! Who knew the San Andreas Fault could be the key to corporate advancement?” “I guess they think they’ve been oppressed too!” “Risk Management 101, Smedley. Never volunteer.” “Let this be our…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here. “Okay, you were right and I was wrong. Global warming is for real. Now will you get off your ass and start swimming?” “I don’t know what to say, Roger. I always thought I’d be the one to give up show business.” “Yeah, and what do we do if the tide isn’t…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here. “Basically, he says we’re in big fucking trouble, but for ten grand he can make it all go away.” “Okay, this is weird. He says he has three names—‘Rip’, ‘Van’, and ‘Winkle’. So I say we eat him.” “He says he’s from the future. If that’s true, it knocks our entire understanding…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here. “You’ll be riding shotgun.” “You have a choice of Wilber or Orville.” “I’m afraid we won’t be able to take you all the way to Chicago today, Mr. Prescott. But we can take you 120 feet closer than you are now, guaranteed.” “Beverage service will be limited. And, frankly, so will everything…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here. “I know I’m a pretty bird! Just leave it alone! For God’ssake!” “We’re going to win and I’m going to tell you why. Because advertising is all about repetition and repetition is what we parrots do best. Just be yourselves and we can’t lose.” “Bob, stop talking like a mynah bird. I’m right…