Tag: cartoon

Legal humor here. “Stop your bitchin’, girlfriend. Pedestrian medicine is here to stay, thanks to you know who. I’ve got a discount on heart murmurs that can save you real money.” “We like to keep an eye on these babies until we get them broken in. Once you get past 54th St. you’re on your…

Legal humor here. “‘Cause baby don’t screw in a chair, that’s why.” “‘Cause the rent is too damn high, and your ass is too damn fat.” “No, Roy, you aren’t being replaced. But you are being co-opted.” “You’re a brilliant analyst, Dr. Thompson. But your ‘standing cure’ is for shit.” “This is how it works:…

Legal humor here. “Yes, Jerry, that is one damn big bubble. Now please give us the run down on accounts receivable.” “Jerry, I think you need to rethink this ‘no foundation’ look immediately. You could get a kick off a candle with that shine.” “Jerry, I can only say that I regard your attitude towards…

Legal humor here. “Congratulations, big boy. Your life just got interesting.” “Because I have a new set of antimacassars that simply demand to be seen, that’s why.” “Yes, it is a change. Welcome to the wonderful world of interpersonal relationships.” “OK, then, don’t think of me as a secretary. Think of me as a life…

Legal humor here. “Yes, he is a by the numbers guy. And, for your information, by the numbers happens to be fabulous.” “You define ‘prosaic,’ Jerry. You define it. And for that very reason, you cannot understand the allure of mystery.” “By completing him, I complete myself. “ “Le cœur a ses raisons que la…

Legal humor here. “Let’s just say that I’m not going to be played the way Irene Dunne played Cary Grant. Mr. Smith will be making up his own mind this time around.” “They’re an amiable breed. I don’t think he’ll have any problem serving two masters.” “I’m sorry if I seem possessive, but this is…

Legal humor here. “This turkey doesn’t belong in the barnyard. This turkey belongs on Broadway, and that’s where she’s going. Pardon my sequins.” “If it can work for those kids on Glee, it can work for me. I’m tired of pecking for worms.” “Legs this pretty are too pretty to eat, you know what I’m…

Legal humor here. “At least you don’t have squirrels. Am I right or am I right?” “Nah, pinching them off just stimulates new growth. You have to go for the tap root with these babies—a special little something I like to call “Essence of Beaver Tail.” “The hell of it is, if we were just…

Legal humor here. “Sorry, dude, there’s only room for one wise man on this ledge, and you’re looking at him.” “I believe the expression is ‘Forget about it.’” “Listen, buddy, I ain’t the Sphinx and you ain’t Oedipus. You came up the wrong building.” “Unless you’re here to wash the windows, I’m not budging.” “You…

Legal humor here. “Stop whining! Get it right and we’ll make them forget all about Snooki!” “This is going to be huge. I can feel it.” “Yeah, I was thinking ‘Gangnam Style’ too, but, you know, more intense. Can we hire that guy?” “OK, I know this a lot to take in all at once….