Legal humor here.
“I know it eats remotes. But it eats other things too.”
“I think our possessions are starting to possess us. Especially this one.”
“I know we got it for the rats. But now I’m starting to miss them.”
“Yeah, it’s cheaper than ball and claw. But it’s creepier too.”
“Buying a love seat for it to play with was a horrible idea.”
“But we can’t keep going in and out the window indefinitely.”
“I don’t like it when it sings ‘I’ve Got You Under My Skin’.”
“Well, now that we’re both over our H. P. Love-Craft obsessions, I think it’s time to get rid of the damn thing.”
“Jerry, feral furniture has had its time in the sun, and now that time is done, and now it’s time for you to do something about it.”
“I know it’s protecting us from the refrigerator, but what is protecting us from it?”
