Legal humor here “Oh, relax! Those windows are beyond bullet proof!” “That’s right people, it is a test! Because if you can’t stare down the working class, you don’t belong at this table.” “Well, what are we supposed to do? Feed them?” “Can’t they understand that if it weren’t for fat-assed rich guys like us,…
Search Results for: NEW YORKER
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Listen up, people! They don’t call him ‘the Professor’ for nothing!” “Welcome to Contemporary Football, gentlemen. Or, as I like to call it, ‘Psych 101’!” “Bob, you’re obviously conflicted. Go short, or go long. And, as the song has it, don’t mess with Mr. In Between!” “And, Frank, your anal obsession is…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Sorry, dad, but you’ll never land me with that line! Ha, ha, just kidding. Who do I have to fuck around here for a rimshot?” “Don’t cast at the target, cast through the target.” “So when do you turn into a handsome prince” Because if you don’t, I am so out of…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “The good news is, it’s free. Although, naturally, we do accept bequests.” “Officially, this is a confessional, but if you just feel like complaining, I’ll understand.” “Another good thing, you can fidget as much as you want.” “Trust me. What an MRI is going to tell you, you don’t want to know.”…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Thirty seconds from now, they won’t be looking so gorgeous.” “Diablement intelligent, ces Américains!” “Hey, where are they from, the Isle of friggin’ Lesbos?” “Take it from me, nudity is a good starter, but a bad finisher.” “If it isn’t a cloud formation, we’re fucked.” “I’m trying to be blasé. How can…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “That is so gay.” “Hey, big boy! Where’s your suit?” “Definitely a Taurus.” “On the other hand, his French is impeccable.” “They say his wife is a real cow.” “Apparently, his family owns half of Herefordshire.” “All hat and no cattle, as we say back home.” “Well, the fertilizer business isn’t exactly…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Yeah, I should be ashamed of myself. But I’m not.” “Quit your bitchin! This is what makes New York New York!” “The traffic? Well, for the Major Deegan, it’s fabulous!” “These days, I’m pretty much King of the Mountain around here.” “It’s the apotheosis of something. That’s the good part.” “Well, I…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “What do you mean you’re out of goldfish? I crawled twelve fucking blocks and you’re fucking out of fucking goldfish? Jesus fucking Christ!” “No Happy Hour? I am so out of here!” “Two Cosmos, please. On a second thought, make it three.” “You drained my life’s blood, Louie, so you may as…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Can’t we come up with something with a little more depth than ‘Rough day at the office, hunbun?’“ “You should have heard the crowd when I ran him over. Like I’m the bad guy!” “I get to keep the swords! Can you beat it? That’s my reward! I get to keep the…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Don’t be cute, Hälfgaard! This damn well does violate my ‘no pussies’ rule and you damn well know it!” “Because Hrolf the Wrathful don’t stop for kitty litter, that’s why!” “That’s not your pet, Hälfgaard! That’s my lunch!” “I don’t know which is gayer, Hälfgaard, your papoose or you!” “I hope it…