“We will be making every effort to avoid further cutbacks in the future, but, sadly, nothing is certain in this life.” “Clearly, the fallout from the Christmas Party continues to reverberate.” “Furthermore, employees will be expected to provide their own beverages and pretzels.” “And then there was one, eh, Mrs. Hanson? But not to worry….
Search Results for: NEW YORKER
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Frankly, Ms. Hobson, I like your style.” “You’ll find us rough, Sarah, but you’ll find us ready.” “And I’ll expect you to keep your office spanking clean.” “Good! I like an employee who wants my job!” “It’s not really a dress code—more of a dress understanding.” “And the objective of this little…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Yeah, some chicks can make an event out of anything.” “I don’t think we’re suckers to follow her so we can look up skirt. I think we’re suckers to follow her so we can look up skirt when we know she’s going the wrong way.” “In another mile I’m going to ask…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Out here, sonny boy, we signal for a left-hand turn!” “In Wyoming, a three-wheeler is technically a motorcycle, so this here license ain’t worth a damn. And, yes, I do get a kick out of busting you Montana fancy-pants.” “You city boys may not give a damn about Gaia, but we do!”…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “That is so gay.” “Sure they can imitate. But can they create?” “It’s ironic because you were the one who wanted to go whale watching, that’s why it’s ironic.” “We’re marooned in an ocean of performance artists. What a Manhattan way to die.” “I could kill for a damn harpoon. I know…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “I have been described—not unjustly, I think—as inscrutable yet fair.” “I know you have lots of questions, but first of all let me assure you that I am not a speciesist.” “Let me begin by saying that I regard all of you as my garden.” “I want to give everyone the chance…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Let’s get one thing straight, Larry. Yeah, we act alike, we dress alike, we even look alike. Sure. But we don’t think alike. Upstairs, I’m my own man, you got that? I’m my own man! Like, totally.” “So, anyway, a priest, a minister, and a rabbi go into a bar, and the…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “For God’s sake, Harry! You know damn well who farted!” “I don’t care if you ignore the elephant! Stop ignoring me! “He isn’t my elephant! He’s our elephant! “He’s lonely, damn it! Can’t you see that? And they aren’t that expensive!” “You know what your problem is, Harry? You’re all elephant and…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “She’s all ruff and no castle.” “From what I hear, when the lights go down the ruff comes off, you know what I’m sayin’?” “I hear she’s Vermeer’s favorite model.” “I don’t know if she’s modestly proud or proudly modest.” “She’s the patron saint of lace-makers.” “Sure, it’s great, but what’s she…
Pseudo New Yorker
Legal humor here “Yeah, I seeing where you’re going with this. But I don’t think you’re really getting there.” “I see it, but I don’t feel it.” “How shall I put this: You can carry it, but you can’t carry it off.” “Beige is not your color.” “You look like the Thing from Leisureworld.” “A…