Legal humor here.
“The play-offs? Goddamn it! That means no ice-skating for like forever!”
“I don’t get enough of this crap at home?”
“I’m pissed because I’m paying ninety bucks an hour to be subjected to philistine patriarchal bullshit, that’s why I’m pissed!”
“I thought we said this week would be a Girls marathon!”
“Group hug, damn it! Group hug or the lady walks!”
“You want my theory? My theory is, the bigger the screen the smaller the dick. That’s my theory.”
“Hey, and let me tell you about your damn beard. It’s so anal retentive it smells like Preparation H!”
“I thought a male psychiatrist could help me! That’s how fucked up I am!”
“Okay, that’s it. We get the chintz curtains or I walk. That’s not revenge. That’s justice, plain and simple.”
“You’re just replacing one addiction with another and you know it, smart ass!”
