O that Paulie Ryan! He’s so handsome! Isn’t he? Just look at him! Just look! How can he be so cute and, you know, so dishonest and corrupt?
Over at the New Yorker, from which I snitched this stunningly sappy photo of Paulie, a bewildered, even broken-hearted Ryan Lizza tries to puzzle the mystery of the endorsement given Donald Trump by his Beloved, whom Lizza once limned worshipfully as “tall, wiry, with a puff of wavy, dark hair”:
“There are essentially two Republican parties right now: the Party of Donald J. Trump and the Party of House Speaker Paul Ryan—who has, nonetheless, endorsed Trump for President. One of the ways in which members of the Ryan faction delude themselves is by believing that Ryan’s policies would dominate if Trump were President and Ryan remained Speaker of the House.”
Of course, Ryan’s claim that Trump, being a Republican president, will dutifully sign whatever legislation a Republican Congress puts on a plate is false, though it’s more of a deception than a delusion. The larger question is, so what if Trump actually signed off on Ryan’s “program”? It’s still crap!
Take Paulie’s legendary “budget,” which again is more of fraud, snare, and delusion than a budget. What are we offered? Massive tax cuts for the rich, massive spending increases for defense, massive cuts in entitlements, which mysteriously disappear any time the Republicans want to win an election, and draconian cuts in domestic discretionary spending, which not even Republicans are willing to vote for. The American people, and the American economy, need none of these. Yet Lizza and the rest of the mainstream continue to buy, and sell, the Speaker’s fraudulent self-appraisal as a disinterested policy wonk—“Guys, I just go where the numbers take me.”
But wait, there’s more. More crap, that is. The New York Times editorial page catches Paulie in another pack of lies, “Mr. Ryan’s Plan to Revert, Regress, and Deregulate”, the Republicans’ economic policy agenda, described by the Times as follows:
“House Speaker Paul Ryan presented his economic agenda last week, but it does not deal with the country’s problems with jobs, wages, investment, trade, inequality or other pressing economic issues. Rather, its 57 pages boil down to one idea: Roll back hundreds of federal regulations that protect consumers, investors, employees, borrowers, students and the environment.”
Hey, Ryan Lizza! Stop sighing over Paulie’s “puff of wavy, dark hair” and look at the crap he’s selling!
