Legal humor here.
“I’m not luggage, damnit! I’m a human washing machine! It’s totally different, so back off!”
“I know I’m supposed to be in the luggage compartment, but they made me buy a ticket and I’m damn well going to use it!”
“You don’t have to worry about me, amigo! I float!”
“Well, this bites. A little turbulence, and they can beverage service for the rest of the flight!”
“Because I’m sitting on a damn knitting needle, that’s why!”
“No, that was All About Eve. It’s in Beyond the Forest that she says “What a dump!”
“Look, I got through security, didn’t I? So I’m DHS approved. Which means that I don’t have to answer to you!”
“Okay, forget it. But just so you know, I’ve got those four-wheel spinners, and they make it a hell of a lot easier, even on rough ground.”
“There’s probably no such thing as an air pocket. That’s just something they say when the pilot fucks up.”
“Just don’t let them bury me in this rig, okay? I mean, I know I screwed up, but still, there’s such as thing as too much irony. Okay?”
