Pseudo-New Yorker

Ham sandwich or notebook? I can deal with the ambiguity. Can you? Legal humor here.

“Sorry, dude, but you climb the Mountain of Mental Health on your back! So stop walking and start talking! I’m listening!”

“Ready for some couch time, hotshot? Twenty bucks says I’m right!”

“Thanks for meeting me half way on this one, Larry. Just give me five minutes with this ham sandwich and we’ll get down to business.”

“Dude, from the look on your face, you’re asking yourself ‘Why the fuck am I doing this?’ Well, let’s talk about that.”

“Sorry, dude, there are no shortcuts on Therapy Mountain. You can’t go around me. You have to come through me. So take a load off and we’ll get right down to business.”

“As a matter of fact, Thoreau started out exactly like this. Hey, I love a skeptic. They give the best referrals!”

“No, I’m not a mirage. It’s okay. I get that a lot.”

“Actually, I’m the Old Therapist of the Mountain. But whichever way works for you works for me.”

“It’s not a test. It’s just that a lot of people prefer to meditate their way to the top.”

“Welcome to Elevated Altitudes, Elevated Attitudes. I’m Frank, and you must be Larry.”