Pseudo New Yorker

Legal humor here.

“Now, if these don’t do the trick—well, if these don’t do the trick, I guess that’s that.”

“That’s very true, Harrison. Intimations of mortality there be that speak as deeply to the soul as those of immortality. But you’re creeping the rest of my patients out.”

“Welcome to ObamaCare, girlfriend.”

“Yes, Billy, I’m sure a prescription for hemoglobin would be a babe magnet. But I’m still not giving you one.”

“You wanted cradle to the grave. This is what it looks like.”

“Okay, it’s not for everyone. But it covers all the bases at a price that can’t be beat.”

“It’s just another promotion. I’m not endorsing them, mind you, but a lot of my patients like the convenience.”

“Well, from now on, let’s try to stay far away from the garlic, shall we? It’s not exactly wolf’s bane.”

“Oh, it’s really just a bit of a conversation piece. You know, pay me now or pay me later. That sort of thing.”

“If I fail to appreciate the irony of your gesture, Mr. Williams, it’s because there isn’t any.”